Why the heck blogging?

These days people say don’t write about me … don’t say this and don’t say that…

They don’t want to be mentioned in my entries. Okay.

It’s may fault, I know. When I had started blogging, I wanted this site of mine to be popular. ANd, I talked about my site with my friends. In a sense, I publicised it.

These days it’s widely read. In average, 80 hits a day.

Some of my readers who I never knew before have been good friends.

A good achievement.

But why do they have problem with my entries?

I have to write and I will write. But since they have objection, I am somtimes writing in my poor German. Not posted here. Posted in some other place. And I wont let you know about that.

But sometimes I password protect the entries.

Let me keep my journal. Don’t object again.

Else I will have to resort to writing in some other place.



Gunaraj maamaa had invited me for gambling today.

They live wiht Marwaris. So, no non-veg stuffs allowed there. I was so happy with that. However, I was surprised to see that stealthily they enjoy the “banned” things there.

One more thing to mention: they drank in front me. They always used to hide this thing too.

Apple juice was for me. But it’s golden colour matched with their wine’s. And it was a shield for them. If somebody would see them drinking, they would say that Keshav too is enjoying it because it’s apple juice.

Prerak, a little cousin of mine, did not know the name of the liquour his dad and the gang was consuming but he with lively acting said, “Yo khayo bhaney hik hik hunchha…” Kids too are smart. May be it’s because of television.

Tyo masu ko ganda le I did not eat anything.

Yuvak drank beer. BUt he was not comfortable doing that in front of me.

I don’t mind though. I know all of them drink but they hesitate to say that…

Mani mamaa said no to alcohol today. May be because of Maiju’s restriction.

Moreover, I won two rhino notes.

Summit talks. But when?

The pace of peace process is annoyingly lackadaisical.

The seven party allaince and its government could not end up with a conclusion regarding the issues to be discussed with the Maoists. Whatever be the reasons.

And, the touted summit talks have been postponed for Friday.

Now, the Maoists for sure will try to take advantage of the government’s lacklustre. They will take to other propaganda.

And the peace process will be pushed for one more month.

By Himanshu Kaishuvam Posted in Uncategorized Tagged

PUO: Pyrexia of unknown origin

My brother has fever for about a week. But yet it could not diagnosed.

Blood culture is negative. No malaria parasites could be seen. Blood cells count is normal. Hemoglobin level is okay.

E. histolytica was seen though. Doc says the liver is slightly swollen. Is this instestinal parasite the reason for the fever that somtimes crosses 104 F?

Generally, other doctors give antibiotics in haste. But Dr. GSL Das does not…

Yes, I like him. Irrational use of antibiotics is harmful in longterm…

In 2004, September I was down with PUO for about a week. That time I asked the doc for antibiotics. He gave. But it was of no help. He suspected Kalaazar, Malaria, Typhoid and what not… But no diagnosis then also.

The fever disappeared after 23rd day. I could go to office then… on 31st day.

It probably was viral fever that time.

Tragedy in Kanchenjunga

The gloomy eyes and nervousness. The realisation of great loss. Again, the WWF Nepal people had feeling of responsibility. They were visiting the families of the deceased ones after the confirmation of the news.

A friend who works there saw me in the office premises when I was about to return the visitor-card. She came to me and said she was busy. I knew that they (she and her colleagues) were about to go outside. Earlier, I had seen her in the Field Room – she was attending a meeting there–but felt inappropriate to call her.

Though the news regarding the finding of the wreckage of the helicopter and confirmation that there was no survivor had already come to the electronic media, the WWF would have felt that there was a moral obligation left on their part: to officially inform the victims’ families about the loss besides condoling them.

Among people working in conservation sector, diplomatic agencies and bureaucrats who visited the WWF, one thing was common: their eyes were felt with tear.
At first, when I entered the documentation room I saw a girl soaking her tear with tissue paper. She may be a WWR staffer or may be a relative of one of the victims… After some time, the room was thronged with visitors.

I did not talk to anybody there except Naveen for some instances. Because the surrounding was very dismal… However, when new visitors would come, Sabita (Dr. Sabita Thapa) used to tell them whatever information she had.

For about 90 minutes she was denying to confirm the news. She said that unless Ghanashyam Gurung, one of the members of the WWF search team, confirms the news (regarding finding of the dead bodies), the WWF would not say anything officially.

However, later she said started talking about the collection of corpses. It then was sure that there were no survivors.

Later, from the Annapurna Rajkumar Dikpal (reporter), and Dhruva Ale (photojournalist) came. They were the only persons I knew two-way. They had come there to get some more information and profile of the WWF big shots.

Dr. Sabita showed reluctance to talk to the journalists. She said the press release as well as the profile of the dignitaries killed in the chopper crash would be published in the WWF site.
I wanted to take photographs there. But I could not venture. Once I asked Naveen whether to take out the camera.. He gestured not to. Yes, it would be inappropriate to take snaps there…
Anyways, this helicopter accident that killed 24 people from different runs of life has caused a loss to the conservation sector in Nepal. Political leader, bureaucrats, technocrats, businessman and scholars were killed in the accident. A colossal loss that has created a giant void that cannot be fulfilled in small time.

My commiseration to the family members of the victims and the organisations that lost their employees.

Prayer for the peace of the souls!

Collosal loss

I am right now in the WWF office. It’s been an hour here.

Earlier the body language of the officials here showed that the news was not good. Still they were waiting for sI am right now in the WWF office. It’s been an hour here.

Earlier the body language of the officials here showed that the news was not good. Still they were waiting for some sort of confirmation from the members of their own team.

Now, people including visitors are talking about no survivors and collection of corpses.

They are going to meet the families of the people on board the missing chooper.

Now, people including visitors are talking about no survivors and collection of corpses.


I have been misused many times.

I am so gullible that to some people I cannot say no.

Today Mr. N took advantage of me… Actually, it was help for him.

Sorry Ms Anu…, I was forced to talk to you as the third character –Mr. A– between you and Mr. N.

Let me confess. It was me who talked to you.

Who killed Krishna Charan?

Who killed the RPP lawmaker?

If it’s the Maoists or its sister organisation, it’s deplorable.

Whoever has killed Mr. Shrestha, also a businessman, this killing points out towards the situation of the law and order in the country. Machine gun (SMG or LMG) was used to shoot out the leader in busy market of Siraha.

Isn’t it the state’s responsibility to take care of the parliamentarians? How can it provide ordinary people with security when it cannot protect their representatives?

In the name of peace process and cease fire, it’s wrong to overlook the security condition of the country.

Besides the Maoists there are others too who are armed. If the goverment undermines this fact, the country will be a playground for criminals.

By Himanshu Kaishuvam Posted in Uncategorized Tagged

Now begins the Dashain

Now begins the Navaratri. Dashain is in our doorsteps. People are in festive mood.

But I am not. I always feel like this. The Malashree too doesn’t excite me. And, the temples? They are no attraction to me this time. The blood-shed temples!

Can you tell me any difference between a butchery and a “spiritual place” during Navaratri?

There are a few questions left to be answered. Yes, by you.

Why the slaughter of animals in the name of deities? Why the animal sacrifice? Why we still sticking to sanguinary rituals?

Are the gods and goddess really sanguivorous?

Well, they are not. (May be there is no existence of theirs.)

Sacrificing animals is one of the ways that epicurean humans have discovered to satiate their taste buds. Not more than that.

Ironically, our state supports this diabolical system. The Guthi Sansthan provides budget to some temples to buy animals for sacrifice.

We all have grown amidst the killings of animals in different occasions. That’s why we are cruel.

Taken the instance of political intolerance and armed uprising in the country that has killed about 15,000 people within 12 years, this all has something to do with our ill customs.

Why to kill animals and why to kill people? All of have equal share in this planet.

Can’t we get enlightened?

Let’s venture to come to the fore against all the evils in the society. Let’s begin to change ourselves first.

Hero to zero: Rajendra Bhandari

Two gold medals that Nepal won in athletics in SAG last month have been taken back after Rajendra Bhandari failed in the doping test.

The record holder Nepali athlete is now zero from hero.

It took years for Rajendra to build up his career as an athlete. However, to find out the success, he chose crosscut. And that was momentary.

The drug he used probalbly helped him increase RBCs in his blood. (May be it helped him develop muscles.) The higher level of RBC was of service for him to transport more oxygen. More oxygen furthered his purpose of running faster. He stood first in the 5 km event and the 3 km steeplechase event.

The prohibited drug was in his urine. Urine was tested for the doping. A higher level of it has been detected in the sample A. The medals he won have been drawn back.

Bhandari would have realise by now “There can be no shortcut to the success.”

Or, he still believes Hitler who in his autobiography Mein Kampf has written: “Success is the sole earthly judge of right and wrong”?

Anup’s poem


(Anup, a fren of mine, wants his poem to be published here. He is a great fan of Jim Morisson!)

For the sake of myself

I have come to realize

Not in the face of truth

But in depth of agony

Thrown out from the womb

Into the rotten society

Outcome of cogently false axiom

An example of an inhuman existence

An example of heretical believes

Extremely anti pious

With inert characters and undignified beliefs

With odious thoughts of natural phenomena


I characterize rest as fervent insects

Extremely malleable like soft clay

Like insipid creatures you crawl for daylight

Should I call you humans or

Just, misleading attractive maggots

As prosaic as you can be (ready to get extinct)

No character in me is of the rest

I am not a human

Yea in the midst of phony, I was never the one

Pure rambling

My machine has been slow these days. And I hate this.

There are some reasons for the slackness and my hating this when it is related to the computers.

526 MB RAM is in vogue but I have to stick to this 128. I have another 256 MB piece stashed away in the cupboard. However, when I insert it in any of the three sluts, tens of rant errors are displayed on the blue screen for some instances and finally the system is halted.

29 programs run at their own and they consume the memory. The McAfee package consumes the maximum followed by this newly installed Live MSN Messenger.

When I go online, a lot of pages are opened in one time. Three messengers viz. of MSN, Yahoo, and Google talk too run side by side. And, what I see is hung machine.

My mouse! It’s discomfiting. If I try to take the cursor so the east, it directs towards north.

I am used to the shortcut keys and though old and dirty this keyboard has been of help.


I want to pierce my ears. I will put on “top” before Dashain, I guess.


World Peace Day! May peace prevail on the earth.

What Deep told me last week is reverberating in my ears.

“If you help people, they will suspect on your intentions some time later. And, if you do a favour to anybody with no bad intentions, either they will take that for granted or they will overlook your role.”

He, a doctor working in a heart centre in Kathmandu, was very emotional when he was sharing his experiences with me.


Naveen asked me to give him a company tomorrow. He wants me to take to Besisahar, Lamjung. He did not tell me why.

I have some others stuffs to follow tomorrow. So, I said sorry to him.


Do your friends ask you,” Why are we friends?”

If you help them, do they ask you “why the help”?

Idiosyncrasy, yes, I understand . But I was sort of surprised when I was asked so….


Thai army did learn something from Nepal for the coup. Isn’t it?

And will the democrats in Nepal be cautious of any such purging back home now?

Democracy is in danger from two quarters here.
Both are extremists.

The rightist extrimists that include the king and his gang, and leftist extremists that include the Maoists.

Beware of extremists!